Monday, September 23, 2013

To the women who bitched about me: Thankyou.

Guess what? The world isn't huge after all. That small
bitch session you had in the little room
over in West Dean College came right over
the planet to me. God I love the Internet.

It's OK, we've all done it. It's what women do.
But you didn't have your cone of silence on, did you?
Stuff always gets back. It's Murphy's Law.

It's the law of chickens. And roosts.

Some of the criticism was actually good and I used it,
so thanks for that. The bit I loved the most was when
you suggested refusing my return to that particular
instructor's workshop. 
I guess you didn't know the overseas flights and venue
reservations were already booked and paid in full?
Yes I'm eager like that. No worries, flights can be cancelled
and the fees weren't that bad. It's the luxury of the Lucky Country.

I had a friend, one of the bitchiest savage queens ever to stalk
the streets of Brisbane. Boy could he dish it. One day he bowled us
over. We'd just sucked the marrow out of some poor person
when he announced this was no longer fun. From now on we
all had to think of 5 nice things to say about them,
and saying they had nice hair didn't count. "5 nice things"
is how I roll these days. Mostly.

So it's fine, really.
The flight fees got made up when Mingle magazine
What a chuckle. I could have written a very different piece,
but 5 nice things wouldn't cut the word count.

So hat's off, splendid job. While I was your
own personal whetstone for that huge axe on your
shoulder, did you wonder maybe not everyone
in the room shared your opinion?

Maybe someone quiet, not saying anything much,
but afraid to disagree, or was the noise
of the grindstone too much?

I love attention, though. Didn't Oscar Wilde
say it's better to be talked about than never
mentioned at all?

I want to thank you. No really, you did me a favour.

It offered the luxury of a complete overhaul. The close
up kind that involves squatting over a mirror.
Grueling personal exfoliation that unburdens years of
heartache. I even cleaned out the studio and made a
heap on EBay.

But that isn't what I am thanking you for.
It's the new deck. It's what the cashed in
flights became. I'm sitting out here now.
Still in yoga pants because I work from home.

It's a gorgeous day.

While I wont be upsetting anyone
with my presence in Europe this year,
I did check in with the teacher, you know,
in case she hated my guts or something.

It required growing another set of ovaries,
but some things have to be done.

Turns out I am not a paper mache pariah
after all and we cleared the air.
She was as graceful as always.

That's about it, really. Therapy is working wonders.
This one is late getting attention because frankly,
there were bigger fish to fry.

You were at the bottom of a very long
and dirty list of jobs. I love a list.
Got a gripe?
Take a seat. Currently serving number 977.


  1. Oh, I hate gossipy bitchy women, who gives them the right? Glad you can see the positives in all this - you have hundreds of blog followers who think you are great which more than makes up for the handful who don't x

    1. Thank you for your comment, I'm waving back. And I'm still cross and angry at those women, may their papier mache creations fall apart!

  2. Good grief. How yuk. I'm glad you're not going.

  3. Ha! let it rip girrrrrl and get it off your chest I say..

    Anyway Karma and all that will catch up with them soon.

    ....I try for one nice thing these days pretty tough sometimes..?

    bestest to you Daisy j xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  4. What a fabulous post. I can sooo relate to it. These small minded folks don't realise that they actually give you wings. You retreat to lick your wounds for a moment and then return stronger, brighter, more wonderful than before and with a bigger smile than ever....that really pisses people off.
    Continue being wonderfully you.

  5. Oh dear - seems you had quite a bad experience. Good that you are being philosophical about it. (I think that's the way to phrase it!)

    Shame you had to cancel things because of those small-minded people. You should have gone and just ignored them.

    I live in France and still can't afford to go to Les Soeurs Anglaises! They cater to a wealthy audience that seems to be (you excepted) made up of gossipy bitches...


    1. Hello Miss Pearly,

      Thanks for your comments, - this happened somewhere else in England. I loved the stay at Les Soeurs, and I look forward to returning at some stage..

  6. Haters gonna hate. I had a similar experience last year - I love the 5 nice things - and my favourite - if you can't say something nice then say nothing at all. Rise above xxx

  7. Well done for getting it off your chest. Some people are just born bitches like the woman that slighted you. It is hard to imagine there are such rude people around who have nothing nice to say. You are well loved by me, your friends and supportive blog followers. XXX

  8. My favourite quote - the best revenge is happiness. Big Neon Flashing Lightbulb Vegas Signpost Letters Happiness. Go for your life!!

  9. Hello Denise. Sounds like you stood in the middle of this emotionally charged situation and did not turn away from facing it. That always (in my experience) causes tremendous change. Congratulations. Love you and your work.

  10. My heart is sore. That's all I can say. Enjoy many, many glorious days on the deck! xoxo

  11. Good for you!
    Count me among your admirers.
    Cheers, Colette

  12. I am among the hoards of BIGGEST FAN of Denise GRRRRL! You can do no wrong in my eyes and heart- I experienced this sort of thing before - having been honest- not intentionally meaning to offend someone, Although I reckon if someone is offended - it's on them! Still it feels shitty being on the receiving end of their insecurities. I am sorry for you dealing with that bullshite! But deal you have, and so well. YAY- YOU! You are mighty! LOVE!

  13. Ding Ding Ding!
    We have a winner, folks!

  14. I am sorry for whatever happened, I met you briefly at ArtFest years ago and have been a fan ever since. I love this post, esp. the last part. You go, grrrl!

  15. hang in there pet. enjoy the deck and the sunshine. that's all.
    oh, and a big hug too.

  16. Ohhhh Denise, not nice. Keep ya head up high.

  17. This takes me straight back to school days........horrible stuff.

    Keep doing what you do best Denise, always look forward to your blog posts and
    love your work........X

  18. Denise - The universe must have been whispering about you, too, for I woke up thinking about Julie Arkell's art and your posts about the European trip and linked to you just about an hour ago. Then - voila - I came across your FB post, came here and all I can say is, to paraphrase, if they're shooting at you, you must be doing something right. Love you. xoxo

  19. Sounds as if bad stuff is going round.....take no notice.
    People who are mean mostly have their own problems to deal with.
    I have an ex-friend who was ghastly and vile (in public places) -now I think she is nuts.
    I watched Bruce's video and send him some virtual treats.

  20. Goodness i cant believe it, what a horrible thing to happen, some people really do have there heads up there arses dont well done to you for staying positive in the face of bitchy shitty people........
    Hugs to you deary..........

  21. Brilliant post, well done.. you will get much more enjoyment from your new deck than from any overseas trip anyway... in my humble opinion.. good things happen at home
    and well done on contacting the tutor.. good move.

  22. Good God I've just found your blog today and stumbled upon a huge internet rumble, obviously I can't ask what it's all about (even though I'm incredibly nosy) but can't guarantee I won't be sitting here racking my brains. What ever it is, your post comes across as extremely dignified and worthy of Bette Davis. As a new reader this beats the usual post of 'today I shall mostly be painting my dog's toenails' I look forward to reading your blog with much interest x

  23. I guess nobody is immune to that kind of spiteful behavior, even someone as awesome as you! I really respect the way you have handled it!

  24. I have not been 'round in a long time

    just read this post

    you . know . what ?

    I love YOU

    Truly Madly Deeply


    I just think You Are The Bomb (thats sooo out of cool to say , but you know...)


    will read again ...and again.

    ~ S.(art tea life)

  25. Ah HahA Haaaaaaaaa (think Phyllis Diller laffing)


    Just reread post

  26. YOU are incredible.
    Their loss.
    excuse the caps...

  27. yikes that's hideous. People are fundamentally baboons aren't they? The other comforting truism I hang onto is that karma will inevitably bite them in the bum.

    Love your blog and you sound like an excellent person! xx


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